章节目录 18

(88106 www.88106.info)    "AHA!"Simonsays.

    "Nottoobad,"saysVeronica.

    "Illhaveanother,"Ralphsays.Heputsatenonthebar.

    "Metoo,"saysVeronica.

    "Illgoalong,"Simonsays.

    "Youtwogettingiton,orwhat?"Ralphasks.

    "Justacquaintances,"Veronicasays."Mereac?quaintances."

    "Dontlooklikemereacquaintancestome,"Ralphsays."Ihaveafeelforthatsortofthing.Theresawaypeoplelook.Theykindofleantowardeachother."

    "Thismusicisalittlemuddy,"Simonsays.ThejukeboxisplayingaMadonnanumber,"IntotheGroove".

    "Youmeanconceptually?"Veronicaasks.

    "Imeanthesound."

    "Idontcare,"Ralphsays."Ifyoutwoaregettingiton.Imjustanoldfriend.Ifyoutwoaregettingiton,Imhappyforyou.Thiskidisnotmytype,actually.Iloveher,butshesnotmytype.Wespentthenightto?getheronce,anditwasadamp,dampevening.Many,manytears.Youremember?"

    "Dontremindme.Iremember."

    "TheBrownPalace,"Ralphsays."Denversfinest."

    "Youweretryingveryhard,"Veronicasays.

    "Ialwaystryveryhard.Oneofthenicestthingsaboutme.Butyoujustsatthereandwept,allnightlong.FirstIsaidtomyself,Ralph,whatisthis?Isthisatactic?Isthisamaneuver?Ifitsatactic,whatstheobjective?Icouldntseeanobjective.SoIdecideditwasgrief,realgrief."

    "Itwasgrief."

    "SoIsaidtomyself,howamItodealwiththisreal,genuinegrief?Roomservice?Booze?What?"

    "Boozewealreadyhad."

    "Stuffacold,starveafever,"Ralphsays."Idecidedthiswasmoreinthecoldarea.Wehadtheirtwenty-twodollarprimerib,ifyouremember."

    "IhadjustbustedupwithJack."

    "Soweresittingtheretearingupthistwenty-two-dollarprimeribintheBrownPalaceatfouroclockinthemorningandshetellsmeIhavearelentlesslypedestrianmind.Rememberthat?"

    "IguessIwasinabadmoodorsomething."

    "Iwasnotunawareofthat,"Ralphsays."Neverthe?lessithurtme,atthetime.NowIcanlaughaboutit."

    "IwasprobablytoodrunktobeassensitiveasIamwhenImnotdrunk,"shesays.

    "Youwereprettyunhappy.Youwereprobablythinking,whatamIdoinginthishotelroomwiththisbozo?"

    "Ineverthoughtofyouthatway.Ialwaysthoughtofyouaskindofafriend."

    "IjustboughtanewMazda,goldincolor,"Ralphsays."Peoplewhoarereferredtoaskindofafriendtendtobuycarsthataregoldincolor."

    "Nowyourefeelingsorryforyourself,"Veronicasays."Stopit."

    "BacktoDenver,"Ralphsays."DenverandmygoldMazda."

    "Thisroundsonme,"Simonsays."Thesameagain?Everybody?"

    INthefirstdreamhewasgrabbedbythreeorfourcopsforfiringachrome-plated.45randomlyinthestreet.Hehadnoideawherehehadgottenthe.45orwhyitwaschrome-plated.Intheseconddreamheawokesittingonaloungeinahotellobbywearingpantsandshoesbutbare-chested."Ivegottofindashirt,"hethought.Thenhewasinanapartment,whichherecognized,tryingtofindashirt.Peopleweresleepingintheapartmentandhekeptbangingintocymbalsonstandsplacedhereandthere.Hecouldntfindashirt.Hismothercameoutofaclosetandaskedhimtobealittlequieter.

    AsoberconversationwithAnne."TimaskedDoretocometoworkforMedlapse,"shesays."Hellmakeheravice-president.Tobeginwith,though,shellhavetobethesecretary."

    "Itsgotcrash-and-burnwrittenalloverit."

    "Shellbeavice-president."

    "Likebeingvice-presidentofabagofpopcorn."

    "Iknow,"Annesays,sighing."GodIhatebeingasecretary.IdiditforthreeyearsinDenver.Theseass?holestellingyouwhattodo."

    "Ifyoucoulddowhateveryouwanted——"

    "Idliketobeanindependentoiloperator.Therewerealotofthoseathome.Realpartyguys.Greathearts."

    "Well,"Simonsays,"thatsaskilltoo.Youhavetoknowhowtoconbanks."

    "Ihadonesemesterofgeology."

    "Maybelawschool?"

    "Terrible."

    "Youdontknowthatforafact."

    "Imatotalfailure."

    "Begin."

    Whenthewomenbegantogetangry,Simonhadnotknownquitehowtoreact.Theysurprisedhim.Hehad,afterall,donelittlemorethangivethemaplacetostay,feedthem,sleepwiththemandtalktothem,extendinggoodChristianfellowship.Buttheyhadtobemadatsomebody,heunderstoodthat,andeveniftheyweremadatthemselvesstillthatwasonlystartingtheen?gine,asitwere,thevehiclestillhadtogosomewhere,winarace,explode,even.VeronicahadcomeinonedaywithaheadlinefromtheNationalEnquirer,

    BOYPRODUCES

    100YARDSOF

    THREADFROM

    HISRIGHTEYE

    andsaid,"Whatcanyoudo,Simon?"

    Somedaystheywereangrywithhim,somedaystheywereangrywitheachother.Fourpeople,manypossibili?ties.Eachpersoncouldbeangryatanygivenpointwithone,two,orthreeothers,orangryattheself.Twopeoplecouldbeangryatathird,threepeopleatafourth.Hereachedforty-ninepossibilitiesbeforehismathexpired.

    Theirmovementthroughtheworldrequiredyoungmen,aclasstowhichhedidnotbelong.Simonlikedyoungmen,withinreasonablelimits,andapproved,ingeneral,oftheideaofyoungmenandyoungwomensleepingtogetherinjoyousdisregardofhistory,eco?nomics,buildingcodes.Letthemhavetheirfourhun?dredsquarefeet.Veronicalikedgarageapartments.Perhapstheyoungmenwoulddowellintheworld,at?tendthenewbranchofHarvardBusinessinGainesville,marketablackbeansoupthatwouldragethroughMiamilikerabiesoravoiceattenuatorcapableofturn?ingcrackersintolispingBrits,andendupwithseventhousandsquarefeetinParisontheIledelaCité.Youngmenhadstiffpricksandsmelledgood,byandlarge,almostasgoodasbabies.Youngwomenbouncedupanddownonyourchestanddazzledyouwithathousandunexpectedattacks.SimoncountedthewaysinwhichhewasGod-visited.

    Sarahcalls."Doyouknowwhatshesdone?"sheasks.Shesreferringtohermother.

    "What?"

    "Falleninlove."

    Simonisastonished."Withwhom?"

    "Themayor.Andhesmarried."

    "GoodGodthatsterrible."

    "Shewascryingonmyshoulderalllastnight."

    "OhLord.CanIdoanything?"

    "Talktoher?"

    "Wouldshewanttotalktomeaboutthis?"

    "Iguessnot.Shesaidyouwerewhatshewastryingtogetawayfrom."

    "Iunderstandthat.Iunderstoodthatalongtimeago."

    "Dontbebitter."

    "Simplestatementoffact.Peoplegettoomuchofeachother.Civilitygoesaway,finally."

    "YeahIthinkyoudbetterbuttout.NotthatyouvehadsomuchtodowiththeaffairsofyourPhiladelphiagrouplately."

    "Well.Doyouhaveenoughmoney?"

    "DaddyyouvebeenaskingmethatsinceIwasthir?teen."

    "Itsareflex.Listen,Sarah,isthereanythingIcandoforher,doyouthink?OrwoulditbebetterifIdidntknowaboutit?"

    "Ithinkshewantsyoutoknowaboutit.Theresnothingyoucandoaboutit."

    "Isheinlovewithher?"

    "Hesamayor.Heneedsalotoflove.Morethanotherpeople.Oceans."

    Howdoessheknowsomuch?"Keepmeposted,"hesays.

    "IdroppedWaysofBeing,theEast."

    "Why?"

    "Itwasboringandtheguylecturedintohistie,mostly."

    VeronicastrampolineisleaningagainstthewallandVeronicaisthrowingbooksatittoseehowfartheywillbounce.Buddenbrooksinapaperedi?tionbouncesagoodtwelvefeet.Doreispaintingherlegsred,withatwo-inchbrushandabigjarintowhichshehascrumbledbrightredEaster-eggglazes.Anneisthreateningtocutoffherlonghair.Shestandspoised,ahankinonehand,scissorsintheother,daringanyointerfere."Anybodymesseswithmegetsthescissorsinthemedulla."Simonsensesunrest.

    Aterriblenight.Simonisinbedbyten,takingaScotchforcompany.AnneandDorearenowwatchingtelevision.Veronicaisoutsomewhere.Aboutten-thirtyAnnecomesintotheroom,strips,andgetsintobedwithhim.

    "Imchilly,"shesays.

    Heturnsheronherstomachandbeginstostrokeherback,gently.Averysculpturalwaist,narrowingsud?denlyundertheribcageandthenthehipbonesflaring.

    WhenAnneleavestogobacktoherownbed,attwo,Doreappearsinthedoorway.

    "Areyoualltired?"sheasks.

    "Probably."Doreclimbsintothebed,clumsily,peelsoffherjeansandbikinipants,retainingthetanktopwhichshescutraggedlyaroundtheneckinthestyleofthemoment.Shetakeshiscockinhandandre?gardsitthoughtfully.

    "Imsadanddepressed,"shesays."Ifeeluseless.AllIdoissitaroundandwatchMTV."

    "Whatdoyouwanttodo?"

    "Something.ButIdontknowwhat."

    "Lotofpeopleinthesameposition,"Simonsays.

    "IdontwanttobealawyerandIdontwanttobeawife.Idontwanttobeamusician.Whatdoesthatleave?"

    "Bebad.Imaginesomethingbad."

    "Likewhat?"

    "Ihavetotellyouwhattoimagine?"

    Shelooksathim."Therewasthisguyonce.Heaskedme,areyouaswalloweroraspitter?"

    "Whatdyousay?"

    "Hewasadoctor.Theytendtobecrude."

    Hestrugglesaroundthebedandbeginstokisstheinsidesofherthighs."Thisisaterriblenight."

    "Why?"

    "Youguysarentsolvingyourproblems.Icanthelpyouverymuch."Hishandsaresplayedoutoverherback,movingupanddown,overtheshouldersanddowntothesplendidbuttocks.Thinkingofbuttercupsandbutterfliesandflyingbuttressesandbuttsofmalm?sey.

    "Veronicahasarash,"shesays,comingupforair.

    "Whatkindofarash?"

    "Darkred.Lookslikeawinestain."

    "Whereisit?"

    "Youllsee."

    Salivaisrunningdownhiscock,tokenofenthusi?asm.

    Veronicawalksin."Whatistakingplacehere?"sheasks,inavoicelikethunder.

    AFTERthewomenhaddepartedSimonsetupasmallofficeinabarelyrenovatedbuildingonWestBroadway.Hewasonthefourthfloor,therewasnoairconditioning,andthebigopenwindowsbroughtintheclamorofthestreet,sirens,rape,outrage.HispartnersinPhiladelphiasenthimsmalljobs,muchasonemightUPSafruitcakeorabraceofpheasanttoonerecov?eringfromanillness,withtheimplicationthattheyweretobeenjoyednotnowbutlater,whenhewasstronger.Hesatathisdraughtingtable,ahollow-coredoorrestingoncarpenterssawhorses,sketchingontracingpaperwithafeltpen.Theproblemwasanof?ficeforasmallfoundationwhichhadleasedspaceinaverygoodblockintheEastSeventies.Thedifficultywasthatalthoughtherewerefloor-to-ceilingwindowsfacingthestreetintheexistingbuilding,verylittlelightreachedthherregions.Hehaddesignedalightscooptobeaffixedtotherearofthebuilding,butfig?uredthatthecostwouldbeprohibitive.Thefireescapewasplacedpreciselywherethetubingforthelightscoopwouldhavetogo,andlightscoopsdontworkverywellanyhow,asboththetygersofwrathandthehorsesofinstructionhadtaughthim.Blakealsohadsomethingtosayaboutfoundations:

    Pityisbecomeatrade,andgenerosityascience,Thatmengetrichby

    Butthatsalittlehard,hethought,thesepeoplearedoingthebesttheycan,pilotingworthyprojectsthroughtheswampsofInanition.Tobeworkingagainfeltverygood.

    SIMONthinksaboutParadise.Onthegreatthrone,anakedyoungwoman,herbacktotheviewer.SimonlooksaroundforOnan,doesntseehim.OnandidntmakeittoParadise?Seemsunfair.Greatdealofmarbleabout,henotices,shadesofroseandterra-cotta;ParadiseseemstohavebeendesignedbyEdwardDurellStone.Sciencehadworkedoutawaytocrematehumanremains,reducetheashestothesizeofabouil?loncube,andfiretheproductintospaceinarocket,solvingtheForestLawndilemma.Simonhadoncedoneasketchproblemontombsculpture,forhissoph?omoreVisualAwarenesscourse.Nomoretombsculp?ture.

    Paradiseunearned.Itwas,rather,agift,inthiswaytheologicallyunsound.Itwasastateorconditionvis?iteduponhim,likebeingintheArmy.Simonhadwalkedaroundingreenfatiguesformostoftwoyears,doingthebesthecouldfromdaytoday,sometimescarryingdrunkencomradesbacktothebarracksatnight,outsideStuttgart,inafiremanslift.Hisdayswerespentinmeaninglessmaneuverswithgiantweap?onswhichtheArmywasafraidtofireforfeartheywouldntwork.Mostly,whentested,theydidnt.SimonreadStars&StripesandverygoodmysterynovelsbyJohnD.Macdonald.OnleaveinBerlinhetriedtofindbuildingsbyKarlFriedrichSchinkel,whoseworkhadnotbeenlostonMies.Thewomenwouldsoonbegone.Thebestthinghecoulddowastolistentothem.

    "Ivehadtwenty-sixyearspracticeinstandingup.Icandoit,"Annesays.

    Sheswearingsweatpantswithadarkgraycrewnecksweaterandmedium-grayReeboks.Shesbeendrinkingtequilaandshesterriblydrunk.

    "Iwanttotellyousomething."

    "What?"

    "Youthinkweredumbbunnies."

    "Whatmakesyouthinkthat?"

    "Yourattitude."

    SimonsbeenreadingAudubonAction,"ArizonaDamProjectFacesNewChallenge."

    "Whatsmyattitude?"

    "Iseefatigueanddisgust."

    "Sweetie,thatsnottrue."

    "Dontcallmesweetie."

    "Anne,"hesays,"youwanttositdown?"

    "Youthinkwerenotbrightenoughforyou."

    "Youreasbrightasanybody.Imeanit."

    "Youhaveanattitudeofdisdain.Sticksoutalloveryou."

    "Justnotso."

    "Veronicathinksyouwantusout."

    "No.Untrue."

    "Shethinksyourmindiswandering."

    "Thatswhatmyminddoes.Wander.RightnowImthinkingaboutthefurnitureofParadise."

    "Whatisit?"

    "Knoll,basically."Hepushesasketchpadtowardher."Butyouseetheyhaventallowedfortheangelswhohaveonlyonewing,soImtryingto——"

    "Theangelshaveonlyonewing?"shesaysinaston?ishment.

    "Someangelshaveonlyonewing."Heshowsheranoldengravinginwhichasingle-wingedangelispic?tured.

    "Howcantheyflywithonlyonewing?"

    "Whatmakesyouthinktheyfly?Intheliteralsense?"

    "Ivealwaysseenthemwithtwowings."

    "Artistslikesymmetry."

    "Helooksimperfect."

    "Youcangetalotaccomplishedwithonewing.Fantheflamesandleadtheorchestra.IsawBuddyRich,thedrummer,playwithabrokenarmonenight.Didmorewithonehandandhistwofeetthan——"

    "Butitdbelikehavingonlyonebreast."Heslipsahandinsidehershirt.Herbreastsarebare."IfIdspentthesameamountoftimeworryingaboutmymindasIhaveworryingaboutmychest,IdbeHegelbynow,"shesays."Imeansincethirteen."

    "OldHegel."

    "Dontbesosnotty.WehaveHegelinDenver."

    "Hegelisquitesexy.Thesis,antithesis,synthesis."

    "Youthinkthatswherehegottheidea?"

    "Couldbe."

    Simonpositionsthewhiteplastereggeightfeettallinthesittingroom.Thewomenarewatching.Hesmashesitwithaniron-headedmaul.Insidearethreenakedyoungmen.TheirnamesareHarry.

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